“Lord, I’m sorry I don’t know you.  But I want to know you. ................. please help me.”


My name is Asha. I would like to share my testimony with you. Even though I was brought up as a Christian, I never knew who Jesus was. I thought He was one of the “many Gods” we have in this world. I never even took the Bible seriously. I thought it was a fairy tale. I used to go to church and receive communion in ignorance. Sometimes I didn’t like going to church because I thought it was boring!

It was only after marriage, with the help of my husband haresh, I began to know Jesus. At first, when he told me that Jesus is the only God who came from heaven in human form, died for us and rose from the dead, I didn’t believe him. I never thought of Jesus to be a LIVING God. But he used to keep telling me about Jesus and all that Jesus had done for him. This lit a desire in me to know more about Jesus.

At this time, we used to attend charismatic prayer meetings which I used to hate going to because I did not understand what was happening there. People shouting, falling and talking in strange languages………..this was too much for me to digest. I even used to make excuses not to attend such gatherings but I kept going, half-heartedly. At a later stage, my hatred changed into a curiosity to know what was happening there. I noticed that the people were enjoying what they were doing. They were freely expressing their love for God and were rejoicing in His presence. I could never praise God or pray like them. I used to watch other people’s actions, what they were doing and why they were doing it. I even used to wonder why people fall at the time of prayer and why am I not falling?

In short, my concentration the whole time was on people, not on God. But slowly, I began to desire this LIVING God more and more that my focus now shifted to Jesus than the people. Gradually, I became more attentive to the preaching taking place there and I realized the truth finally……….that Jesus is the one and only God. (1Co 8:6 yet there is for us only one God, the Father, who is the Creator of all things and for whom we live; and there is only one Lord, Jesus Christ, through whom all things were created and through whom we live.)

It was on that day, rather than seeing what others were doing, I completely surrendered myself to the Lord and said a small prayer in my heart: “Lord, I’m sorry I don’t know you. But I want to know you. I only know this much - that you died for me and saved me. I don’t even know how to pray, please help me.” The next thing I know is that I am on the floor. I experienced the power of God in me so strongly that I collapsed. It was only then that I realized that for God to work in me, I had to surrender myself completely. I even had to surrender my intellect to God as I tried to use my wisdom to understand Him. (1Co 2:5 Your faith, then, does not rest on human wisdom but on God's power.)

I used to doubt the existence of God but now I know that He lives. He is more than willing to reveal Himself to us and would love to enter our hearts, if we only let Him.

I give glory & thanks to God for all that he had done in my life. Praise God.

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